Funny

Ten Funniest Florida Man Stories from the Last Ten Years

roweltyl000 True Crime , , , , , , 0 Comment
Florida Man

A Florida Man Article is a common name for a crime that is either really funny or really stupid. They’re called “Florida Man” articles because Florida has a law that every crime must be reported in the news, so even though funny and stupid crimes happen in every state, Florida Man stories are specifically from Florida men and women. These are the top ten funniest ‘Florida Man’ stories from the last ten years, collected from other news sources like floridaman.com.

1. Florida Man Throws Live Alligator Through Wendy’s Drive Thru Window

A man drove to a local Wendy’s in his truck, ordered through the Drive Thru, but when it came to pay, he asked for all of their money and when the worker refused, the man proceeded to throw a live alligator into the Wendy’s via the Drive Thru window. The restaurant was evacuated and the police apprehended the man. 

2. Florida Man Tries to Steal a Chainsaw By Stuffing it Down his Pants

A man walked out of Treasure Coast Lawn Equipment with a chainsaw reportedly “stuffed down his pants.” Witnesses said that he had gone to a cashier and engaged in small talk while concealing the chainsaw in his pants. The man was arrested for shoplifting the chainsaw. 

3. Florida Man Wrecks Car in Disney World Parking Lot, leaves $100 and note “sorry”

A man reportedly left Disney World to find his car in the parking lot wrecked, with a note saying “sorry” and a $100 dollar bill. The man shared this story on Reddit, and many people commented with their sympathy and questions. The man was mystified by how his car was wrecked, and still doesn’t know who did it. 

4. Florida Man Steals, Takes Excavator for Joyride, Crashes into Walmart

A man stole an excavator from a construction site, and while driving it around the city, crashed into a Walmart. No one was injured during the crash, but the commotion caused a lot of panic from within the Walmart. The man was found unconscious inside the excavator, and was arrested. 

5. Florida Man Crashes Car into Mall, Claims He was Trying to Time Travel

A man was arrested for speeding and crashing into a mall, while he claimed he was trying to time travel. The man was tested for drugs and alcohol influence during the arrest, and it was confirmed that he was under the influence.

6. Florida Man Takes an Ambulance for a Joyride, Turns himself in at the Police Station

Florida Man steals an ambulance from a hospital, and after driving it recklessly around the city, drives to the police station and turns himself in. The man claimed he was sorry, and apologized to the hospital. Later, a man reported a theft that he had witnessed, and the man was proven guilty. 

7. Florida Man Drove Stolen Truck to Space Force Base, Warns them of Aliens and Dragons

A man stole a truck from a grocery store parking lot, drove it to the Patrick Space Force Base, and warned everyone he could see there that they were about to be attacked by aliens, and that if they didn’t die of the “aliens’ cannons,” they would be attacked by dragons from the east. The man was arrested by the police, who were called shortly after the truck was stolen.  

8. Florida Man Breaks into House, Cleans it, Leaves behind Origami

A Florida man broke into an elderly woman’s home, took cleaning supplies from a cupboard, and cleaned the house in the middle of the night, before quickly folding a paper origami crane and leaving it on the kitchen island. The man left and was caught and arrested by the police early the next morning, from a report and evidence from a security camera within the home. 

9. Florida Man Tries to Evade Cops by Cartwheeling Away

A man was arrested by the police after blocking traffic by doing “flips on the road.” During the arrest, the man somehow broke free and tried to escape by cartwheeling down the street. The cops apprehended him a block away from the initial scene. 

10. Florida Man Jumped Naked on Neighbor’s Trampoline before Breaking into the Home 

A man broke into his neighbor’s house, after jumping on their trampoline naked. The household called 911, and the cops came to arrest the man. During the investigation, the man sat on their lawn, still naked, and ate grass while they asked him questions. He told the police that he was purposefully breaking and entering his neighbor’s home, and they arrested him. 

Summary

Yes, Florida Man stories are hilarious! So, whether it’s using a live alligator as a partner in crime, or breaking and entering just to be nice, Florida Man articles are funny, and when you look at them all together, you wonder, “Did that really happen?”

Weird World Records

palmeely000 Uncategorized , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , 0 Comment
Weird World Records

WEIRD WORLD RECORDS

Their is a lot of world record and a lot of weird ones. So here is a list of some of the weirdest world records and who holds them.

STRETCHIEST SKIN

Garry Turner gets the award for stretchiest skin for being able to stretch his skin 15.8 cm (6.25in). He is able to do this because of a very rare medical condition called Ehlers-Danlos syndrome. It’s a condition of the connective tissue, that affects the skin, ligaments, and internal organs.

BIGGEST COLLECTION OF RUBBER DUCKS

Rubber duck lady

A pretty weird record is the record for the most rubber ducks, currently held by a woman named Charlotte Lee. Charlotte is 54 years old and has a collection of 5,631 rubber ducks, and counting!

LONGEST FINGERNAILS

Finger nail Lady

Dianna Armstrong currently holds the record for longest finger nails. Witch measure at 42-feet, 10.4 inches. The previous holder of this record broke her nails in a car accident. Dianna refuses to ever cut her nails in the memory of someone she knew that died.

SHORTEST DOG LIVING

Smallest dog

Currently the shortest living dog on earth is a Chihuahua named Pearl. Pearl is 2 years old and is shorter than a popsicle stick. She measures to 3.59 inches tall.

WORLD RECORD FOR MOST PIERCINGS

Lady with most peircings

Elaine Davidson currently holds the record for the most piercings. Elaine Davidson lives in Belem, Brazil, and is married to Douglous Watson. She has over 15,000 and claims she isn’t stopping anytime soon. She got her first piercing in 1997. All her piercings are estimated to weigh about three kilos or 6.61387 pounds.

MOST CONSUMED BIG MACS

Man whose eaten most big macs

70 year old, Don Gorske, holds the record for most consumed big macs. He has eaten over 34,000 big macs! Don used to eat nine big macs per day, but for health reasons he has shortened that down to two big macs per day. He has one big mac for lunch and one for dinner. And he walks around 6 miles each day.

MOST SPOONS BALANCED ON SOMEONES FACE

While i can’t even get one spoon to stay on my face  Dalibor Jablanovic managed to balance 31! Dalibor Jablanovic lives in Stubica, Serbia. And on 28 September 2013 he broke the record and balanced 31 spoons on his face.

MOST HOLES IN FACE

James goss currently holds the record for most holes in his face. There is 17 holes in his face located on his nose, lips, and cheeks. And you can imagine he would get weird looks from people in public. But according to James it makes him who he is and he doesn’t care about other people’s opinions.

HEAVIEST TRAIN PULLED WITH BEARD

The world record for heaviest train, that was pulled with a beard (Yes a beard), is currently held by Ismael Rivas Falcon. The train he pulled with his beard weighed 6,069  pounds and he pulled it 32.8 feet. He broke this record in Madrid, Spain on Novemember 15, 2001.

RECORD FOR LONGEST NOSE

The world record for biggest nose was held by Mehmet Ozyurek, before he died at age 75. His nose measured to 3.46 inches and he was officially given the record in November 2021.

SHORTEST PERSON EVER

The shortest person ever recorded was Chandra Bahadur Dangi. Chandra Bahadur Dangi is 54.6 cm or 21.5 in in height. Sadly Chandra Bahadur Dangi died in 2015.

TALLEST PERSON ALIVE

Currently the tallest person alive is Sultan Kösen. Sultan Kösen is 41 years old and he is 251 cm or 8 ft 2.82. He is part of the 10 to 15 people in history that have gotten to be over 8 feet tall.

https://nypost.com/2022/10/05/woman-with-worlds-longest-fingernails-struggles-in-bathroom/

https://www.boredpanda.com/weirdest-guinness-world-records/

Studies Found- Apple Juice has More Floor Cleaning Properties Than Name Brand Floor Cleaners

ianweidauer Uncategorized , , , 0 Comment
Studies Found- Apple Juice has More Floor Cleaning Properties Than Name Brand Floor Cleaners

Recent studies done by MIT students revealed that Mott’s®  Apple Juice actually contains more chemicals used for cleaning products than most floor cleaners. 

Name Brand floor cleaners include ingredients such as C9-11 pareth, sodium C10-16 alkylbenzenesulfonate, sodium citrate, carboxymethyl inulin, benzisothiazolinone, sodium carbonate, C10-16 alkyldimethylamine oxide, propylene glycol butyl ether, colorants, and fragrances, which have been found harmful for your floorboards and strip them of their natural beauty. It also includes bleach which is harmful to your stomach, meaning you cannot drink it like you can with Mott’s® Apple Juice. Mott’s® Apple Juice contains Vitamin Apple which is shown to be healthy for your stomach, meaning you can drink it?

With Mott’s® Apple Juice, it makes your floors nice and shiny and gives a warm, welcoming scent of apple while Name Brand floor cleaners smell like C9-11 pareth, sodium C10-16 alkylbenzenesulfonate, sodium citrate, carboxymethyl inulin, benzisothiazolinone, sodium carbonate, C10-16 alkyldimethylamine oxide, propylene glycol butyl ether, colorants and fragrances. Mott’s® Apple Juice also has its negatives, such as making your floors too shiny and giving off an amazing scent which will make you fall so in love with the product. 

In a viral video made by TikToker and Music producer YSSN Nino, he claims that, “They’ve been using apple juice as floor cleaner?”

Video and Image via https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=onmBdTGsk1E

More uses for Mott’s® Apple Juice

Mott’s® Apple Juice has been recently found to be a 19 in 1 product, with uses such as: Yummy drink, floor cleaner, hair gel, dish soap, toothpaste, lubrication, body soap, socks, shampoo, conditioner, deodorant, perfume, cologne, spray can, medication, eye drops, toilet water, tide pods, and bleach. By replacing these items with Mott’s® Apple Juice, you can live a healthier life, more close to Mott’s® and Mott himself.

Mr. Mott of Mott’s® Apple Juice has invited families all over the world to use his brand of apple juice as floor cleaner, instead of Name Brand floor cleaners and other brands of apple juice. This is because his apple juice is made of real apples while other apple products and apple juices are made of fake, synthetic plastic apples, not fit for human consumption. Again, he suggests you to use his apple juice instead of floor cleaner because floor cleaner does not include real or fake apples, it includes C9-11 pareth, sodium C10-16 alkylbenzenesulfonate, sodium citrate, carboxymethyl inulin, benzisothiazolinone, sodium carbonate, C10-16 alkyldimethylamine oxide, propylene glycol butyl ether, colorants and fragrances. 

Sources

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=onmBdTGsk1E

https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.istockphoto.com%2Fphoto%2Fyoung-woman-cleaning-house-gm1055225650-281961745&psig=AOvVaw0enzLEYIc0Lij9z6OjLR9l&ust=1681840808262000&source=images&cd=vfe&ved=0CA0QjRxqFwoTCPiO-rO_sf4CFQAAAAAdAAAAABAD

https://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=https%3A%2F%2Fmedia.istockphoto.com%2Fid%2F503096289%2Fphoto%2Fapple-juice-pouring-from-red-apples-into-a-glass.jpg%3Fs%3D1024x1024%26w%3Dis%26k%3D20%26c%3DqOzdHA9qSnIwk9-LjE6FK5-jSQicVqgv73-ppQ9JM9A%3D&tbnid=Fqg-PAciXfBzRM&vet=12ahUKEwimyNfEv7H-AhU_PUQIHQS6CcwQMygAegUIARDVAQ..i&imgrefurl=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.istockphoto.com%2Fphoto%2Fapple-juice-pouring-from-red-apples-into-a-glass-gm503096289-44010364&docid=YbB0P9NLfee6IM&w=1024&h=683&q=apple%20juicde%20stock%20image&safe=active&ved=2ahUKEwimyNfEv7H-AhU_PUQIHQS6CcwQMygAegUIARDVAQ

 

Top Ten Most Bussin Games 

jaspermiller Uncategorized , , , , , 0 Comment
Top Ten Most Bussin Games 

Number 1: Red Dead Redemption 2    10/10

If you like cowboys and killing and hunting and doing some quests and shooting people with a gun you would love Red dead redemption 2 and you can play two first cause it’s a pre-qual. It has a honer system so if you help somebody you get honer when people talk with you but if you do bad things you get honor taken away and the NPCs will say bad things about you in towns. This game took 8 YEARS in development. And there are points in the game where a crow will drop dead in front of you if there is a npc going to kill another npc. 

 Number 2: Phasmophobia 8.5/10

 This is a game where you go hunt ghost and you can talk with the ghost with a spirit box and you have to go find cursed items and summon the ghost there are tarot cards witch all have powers like killing you right away starting a hunt , then there is the summoning circle where if you light it the ghost just sits there and you can take pictures of it, than there is the ouija board where you talk to ghost, than the voodoo doll where if the needle goes to the heart it starts a hunt.

 Number 3: Poker 10/10 

Poker has many game modes like Texas Hold’em, Omaha, seven-card stud, five card draw, and high low chicago And there are a lot more modes. You can play for money for fun and if you are super good you can go to Las Vegas and play for A LOT of Money and when I say a lot I mean a lot. This can lead to an addiction and nobody wants that.

Number 4: Super Smash Bros Ultimate 10/10 

This is a fighting game where all Nintendo characters go into a ULTIMATE fight hence the name. Most of the characters are Nintendo but there are some other non-Nintendo characters like Steve from minecraft, Terry from Fatal fury series, Sonic the Hedgehog from sonic, and Kazuya from Tekken the mobile game. There are some overpowered characters like Bayonetta. And the DLCs from this game are great. The dlc characters are Piranha plant from super mario bros,  Joker from persona five, Hero from dragon quest, Banjo and Kazooie, Terry from Fatal fury, and Byleth from fire emblem. There is a fighter pass two which includes Min Min from arms, Steve and Alex from minecraft, Sephiroth from final fantasy, Pyra and Mythra from Xenoblade Chronicles, Kazuya from Tekken, and Sora from kingdom of hearts. This game is great but it is exclusive to the Nintendo switch. 

Number 5: The Elder Scrolls Skyrim 7/10

This game is beautiful. But It’s crazy long but you get to pick your race out of ten options which are Argonian, Breton, Dark elf, High Elf, Wood elf,  Imperial, Khajit, Nord, Orc, and Redguard. There all fine classes with there down sides except one and i know it’s the best cause it’s the one i use The Argonian witch lets you swim without having to go get air witch is awesome and nobody like the Khajiits cause when they die there tail keeps moving and there cat people so there face is ugly to. 

Number 6: Tetris 10/10

Tetris is a puzzle video game created by the Soviet software engineer Alexey Pajitnov in 1984. It has been published by several companies for multiple platforms such as PS2, Nintendo gamecube, Nintendo game boy advance, X-box, Pc, NES, And Nintendo switch. I think it’s so cool that russians can make good games., The game where you try to make lines to get points.

Number 7: Animal Crossing for Gamecube 10/10

You would think I would put Animal crossing new horizons but no the villagers have no life in new horizons but on the gamecube version i GOT YELLED AT BY A CHICKEN you don’t get that experience that in new horizon. But Horizon does have its things like the items are better in a lot of ways like getting a godzilla statue, mario items and super cool outfits but the gamecube version has its moments like.. Taking forever to pay off your debt. I just prefer the gamecube version cause the villagers have fun stuff to say. Like you can change the town music to BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG. You can fish but it takes a long time. 

Number 8: Prince of Persia 6/10

This  game is like playing in a painting. It’s just so beautiful. The fighting mechanics are super good but trust me you will fall a lot and when i say a lot i mean a lot. In the beginning you are looking for a donkey cause the donkey has a lot of gold and stuff on it so as your looking you fall into a hole and you hear someone yelling and now you’re chasing a girl who tells you that she is a princess and she helps you by if you fall she pulls you back up or to fight the goo monsters. But before you meet the goo monsters you have the princesses dad opens some gods portal and lets out a GIANT GOO MONSTER LIKE WHAT and then the goo monster talks. All in all great game.

Number 9: The Borderlands, The Full Series 8/10

Oh boy these games are good they have made so much money and for good reason too there super fun there are so many of these games (ok not to many) but they can be a pain on some missions in the first borderlands you have to go thru a tunnel system fighting brutes and brutes are hard to kill The first boss was easier to kill than the brutes and his name was nine toes and three balls. The right order to play them (chronological order) is borderlands, borderlands the pre-sequel, borderlands 2, tales from the borderlands, then borderlands 3. It is said that gearbox will release 6 more games by 2026 and its is said that borderlands 4 will be one.

Number 10: Cuphead 10/10

This game is AMAZING. it’s so good the style is AMAZING the music just hits like it hits every single scene that you see in that game is hand drawn it came out almost SIX YEARS ago the dlc came out recently. This game is about to cups who gambled their soul away at the casino right to the devil and you have to go get it back fighting the devil’s minions and some of them (all of them) are hard fights like i spent so long on the frogs you fight and that’s just normal mode and their is not a hard mode its only normal and easy.

Honorable mentions

  1. Witcher Wild Hunt
  2. Hello Kitty Racing
  3. Zelda Breath of the Wild
  4. Uno
  5. Red Dead Redemption 1

Newest YouTube uploads, Must Watch

muelleve000 Uncategorized , , 0 Comment
Newest YouTube uploads, Must Watch
  1. Lindsey Stirling – Lords: Lords Mobile

Good study music to listen to.

Lindsey Stirling – Lords: Lords Mobile

 

  1. Mr. Beast – $456,000 Squid Game in Real Life!

Very funny and family friendly.

$456,000 Squid Game In Real Life!

 

  1. Moriah Elizabeth – Customizing a BUNCH of Shoes

The designs are adorable.

Customizing A BUNCH of Shoes

 

  1. Technoblade – JAILBREAK [DREAM SMP FINALE]

Super intense and cool.

         JAILBREAK [DREAM SMP FINALE]

 

  1. Ed Sheeran – Shivers [Official Video]

This is some more music to listen to.

Ed Sheeran – Shivers [Official Video]

 

  1. Carter Sharer – Last to Leave Monster Truck Wins $10,000

Very funny and energetic.

Last to Leave Monster Truck Wins $10,000!!

 

  1. Mr.Beast – I Cleaned The World’s Dirtiest Beach #TeamSeas

Fun and cool. Keep the seas clean please donate.

        I Cleaned The World’s Dirtiest Beach #TeamSeas

 

  1. Game Master Network – LAST TO LEAVE TRAMPOLINE WINS

Very bouncy, I would definitely do this.

LAST TO LEAVE TRAMPOLINE WINS

 

  1. Jennifer Lopez – On My Way (Marry Me) (Official Lyric Video)

This is a good song, I like it.

Jennifer Lopez – On My Way (Marry Me) (Official Lyric Video)

 

  1. Dr. John Campbell – Ivermectin in Japan

Very educational, good for people plan on being a lawyer or government official.

Ivermectin in Japan

 

  1. Stephen Sharer – Last to Leave School Bus Wins $10,000!!

Very interesting and funny.

Last To Leave School Bus Wins $10,000!!

 

  1. Techno Gamerz – MINECRAFT SPEEDRUNNER VS HUNTERS

Super intense, would recommend watching.

MINECRAFT SPEEDRUNNER VS HUNTERS

  1. ItsFunneh – Roblox Would You Rather but it’s challenging…

Super entertaining to watch, pretty funny.

         Roblox Would You Rather but it’s challenging… 

 

  1. TG Plays – The LAST Update before Fortnite Chapter 3!

This is for all you Fortnite fans out there.

         The LAST Update before Fortnite Chapter 3!

 

  1. My Self Reliance – Heavy Lifting Alone! Building an Off Grid Log Cabin Alone in the Wilderness, Ep6

Super cool, it must be very cold out there all alone. How did they get wifi for their camera? I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS!!!

       Heavy Lifting Alone! Building an Off Grid Log Cabin in the Woods | Alone in the Wilderness, Ep6

 

  1. Hawa Singh – Stop Making This Type of Video on YouTube l Latest YouTube Tips & Tricks

Looks like I won’t be making that type of video any time soon.

Stop Making This Type of Video on YouTube | Latest YouTube Tips & Tricks

 

  1. CBS Evening News – South Africa Identifies new coronavirus variant

WHY ARE THERE SO MANY COVID-19 VARIANTS. I HATE COVID AHHHHH!!!!!!!

South Africa identifies new coronavirus variant

 

  1. CookieSwirlC – Kissy Missy in the Factory ( Roblox Poppy Playtime )

Spooky, Scary, AHHHHH HUGGY WUGGY

Kissy Missy in the Factory ( Roblox Poppy Playtime )

 

  1. Bollywood Latest Songs – Bollywood Latest Songs 2021 💖 New Hindi Song 2021 💖 Top Bollywood Romantic Love Songs

I am not a fan of Bollywood, but the video was ok.

Bollywood Latest Songs 2021 💖 New Hindi Song 2021 💖 Top Bollywood Romantic Love Songs.

 

  1. MarkAngelComedy – Temptation – Episode 340 (Mark Angel Comedy)

This was just straight up funny. Y’all should watch it.

Temptation – Episode 340 (Mark Angel Comedy)

 

  1. Peppa Pig – Official Channel – 🔴🔴🔴🔴 Live: Peppa Pig’s Funny Drawing l Kids Cartoon

PEPPA PIG, HI I’M PEPPA PIG (lol) Show this to your baby relatives.

🔴🔴🔴🔴 Live: Peppa Pig’s Funny Drawing | Kids Cartoon

 

  1. 🌈 Nursery Rhymes and Baby Songs l Dave and Ava 🌈

MAX & RUBY… oh wrong show, MUSIC FOR CHILDREN!!!!!!!!

         🌈 Nursery Rhymes and Baby Songs | Dave and Ava 🌈

 

  1. Nintendo – Nintendo Switch – OLED Model – Announcement Trailer

New switch, gonna be dope, definitely would buy it.

Nintendo Switch – OLED Model – Announcement Trailer

 

  1. GOODZIK – Amazing Makeup Transformation Challenge (Don’t Judge me Challenge) l Goodzik

TIKTOK, very funny

Amazing Makeup Transformation Challenge (Don’t Judge Me Challenge) | Goodzik

 

  1. Moriah Elizabeth – Making Beaded Keychains & Custom Charms

Cool to try it out yourself. 

Making Beaded Keychains & Custom Charms

 

  1. Moriah Elizabeth – Reacting to My OLD Squishy Makeovers

The reactions are priceless

Reacting to My OLD Squishy Makeovers

 

7 crazy Florida man stories

lewisbai001 Uncategorized , , , , , , 0 Comment
7 crazy Florida man stories

We’ve all heard the crazy Florida man headlines. They are always crazy, weird, and unbelievable. So here are seven weird and crazy Florida man stories.

 

  1. A Florida man saved his dog from alligator grasps. The Florida Wildlife Federation and the fStop foundation placed cameras in residents’ backyards to capture the wildlife and because of this, it was all caught on camera. Richard Wilbanks recovered his 3-month-old puppy Gunner from the grasps of the alligator. “I never thought an alligator could be that fast. It was so quick,” Wilbanks told the network. Wilbanks is fine and his dog has recovered from his puncture wounds. 

 

  1. A Florida man was hospitalized after an iguana ran into his bike. A man about 62 was riding his bike down the road when an iguana darted in front of him. The iguana became lodged in this front tire and front wheel fort. This caused the tire to lock, throwing the man over the handlebars. He landed on the asphalt and got some scrapes and bruises as well as stitches.

 

  1. A Florida man busted for trying to steal a full rack of ribs by stashing it in his pants. 26-year-old Maeli Alvarez-Aguilar was trying to sneak out of Rines Market in Indiantown. He was caught and then removed a full rack of ribs that he was hiding in his waistband. A further search of him uncovered two packs of hamburger buns, nine pieces of fried chicken, and some mashed potatoes. 

 

  1. A Florida man tries to avoid arrest by wiggling out of cop’s grasps and cartwheeling away. 40-year-old Gianfranco Fernandez was taken down for blocking traffic by doing a flip in the middle of the road. Fernandez was able to wiggle out of the cop’s grasp and then proceeded to do cartwheels in an attempt to get away but he didn’t get very far. He was charged with battery on a law enforcement officer and resisting arrest.

 

  1. A Florida man was arrested for trying to get an alligator drunk. 27-year-old Timothy Kepke was feeding an alligator beer. Kepke’s friend, 22-year-old Noah Osborne caught the alligator with his bare hands. Kepke fed the gator some beers and in the process got bit. They told the police they were going to release the alligator back to the wild after they fed it beer. They were both arrested for unlawfully taking an alligator.

 

  1. A Florida man protects his car from a hurricane by hiding it in his kitchen. Patrick Eldridge, of Jacksonville, was afraid his car might blow away in hurricane Dorian. “My husband was afraid his car might blow away and my car is in the garage,” Jessica, his wife said. Florida ended up dodging most of the storm and Patrick removed his car from his kitchen.

 

  1. A Florida man was injured after sticking his hand in a jaguar cage. This unidentified man had been taunting the cat before jumping over the barrier. He then proceeded to stick his hand in the jaguar’s cage. The jaguar clawed at the man’s arm leaving a mess for the zoo employees to clean up after they took him to the hospital. “This is an individual that wasn’t using his head… He stuck his hand in through the mesh that separates the jaguars from the outside,” deputy zoo director Dan Maloney told the outlet, before adding that the incident “would have been a very different story” if the animal had been able to secure a stronger grip on the man.

Ho, Ho, Holiday Jokes!

heinzale000 Uncategorized , , , , , 0 Comment
Ho, Ho, Holiday Jokes!

As holidays come around the corner there are treats and fun and best of all, there are corny jokes. Everybody knows the classic dad jokes that all teenagers sigh at and roll their eyes. Dad jokes such as “Dad, I’m hungry,” then he’ll say, “Hi hungry! I’m dad!” Everybody knows those kinds of jokes, some are super funny and others you just facepalm at. Holidays are the best, Christmas, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Easter, Valentine’s Day, and New Year’s Eve. There are lists and lists of jokes for these holidays, these are some amazing jokes to tell around the holidays.

 

New Year’s Eve

First, we start the year with parties and cider, but the one thing it’s missing is the funny jokes to get everyone laughing. Here are some of the very awesome and funny New Year’s Eve jokes.

  1. One of my New Year’s resolutions is to stop procrastinating, but I’ll wait until tomorrow to start.
  2. Why should you put your new calendar in the freezer? To start the new year in a cool way.
  3. Knock knock, who’s there? Abby, Abby who? Abby new year!
  4. What is corn’s favorite day? New Ear’s Eve!

 

Valentine’s Day

The first holiday of the year then the next big one. For love is in the air and Cupid has a job to do for this is the month of love. That’s right next is Valentine’s Day with love in the air and amazing corny jokes to pick up your date. Here are some awesome Valentine’s Day jokes.

 

  1. What did the paper clip say to the magnet? I find you very attractive.
  2. I thought I won the argument with my wife as to how to arrange the dining room furniture. But when I got home the tables were turned.
  3. How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend? He gave her a ring!

 

Easter

There is nothing better than waking up and going out to search for Easter eggs, but there is also another thing to search for, Easter jokes! These are some of the most eggcellent Easter jokes ever!

 

  1. Where does Easter take place? Where eggs mark the spot!
  2. What happens when you get married on Easter? You live hoppily ever after!
  3. What do you call a bunny with fleas? Bugs bunny!
  4. How does the Easter bunny keep his fur looking so nice? With hare spray!

 

Halloween

It’s that time of year, where the leaves change color, everything gets scarier, and where jokes are best for the season. The holiday of pumpkins, ghouls, ghosts, tricks, and treats, and amazing jokes and puns.

 

  1. What do you catch from a vampire in winter? Frostbite!
  2. Why did the scarecrow win the Nobel prize? Because he was outstanding in his field!
  3. What would a national holiday be for vampires? Fangs-giving!
  4. Why didn’t the skeleton go to prom? He no body to go with.

 

Thanksgiving

I am so grateful for this amazing opportunity to have a big meal with all my family and friends and to make incredible jokes. While everyone fills up their plates and their stomachs I will share some amazing thanksgiving jokes.

 

  1. Why did the farmer separate the chicken and the turkey? Because he sensed fowl play.
  2. Why did the turkey join the band? Because he had his drumsticks!
  3. How come the turkey didn’t eat dinner? He was already stuffed!

 

Christmas

The last holiday of the year, Christmas! The beautiful lights and the presents are under the tree. A time of joy with your closest family and friends and with the best seasonal jokes.

 

  1. What do you call Santa when he stops moving? Santa pause.
  2. How does Rudolph know when Christmas is coming? He uses his calen-deer!
  3. What is a parent’s favorite Christmas carol? Silent night!
  4. What kind of music do elves like? Wrap music.
  5. Why didn’t the tree get a present? Because it was too knotty!

 

Conclusion

 

In conclusion, jokes make everyone laugh, you just need the right ones. Holidays are amazing times to spend time with the people you love and care about. Make sure if anything is bland, add a little laughter to any holiday with these awesome and funny jokes. So go out there and make the world a better and much funnier place!

Top 5 Karen moments and freakouts

Kade Daniels Uncategorized , , , , , , , 0 Comment
Top 5 Karen moments and freakouts

The people we all love and hate… Karens. Karens are stupid. Karens are boomers. Karens ruin everything. And I mean everything. Karens also happen to be funny. Luckily for you, I scoured the internet far and wide to find the best, funniest, and most ridiculous Karen moments and freakouts. These videos demonstrate and show just exactly what a Karen is. What exactly is a Karen though? Let me explain.

The Origin Story

According to Wikipedia,

“a Karen is a pejorative term for someone perceived as entitled or demanding beyond the scope of what is appropriate or necessary. A common stereotype is that of a white woman who uses her privilege to demand her own way at the expense of others. Depictions also include demanding to “speak to the manager”, being racist, being anti-vaccination, or sporting a particular bob cut hairstyle. As of 2020, the term was increasingly being used as a general-purpose term of disapproval for middle-aged white women.”

Karens also have very distinct haircuts. The haircut is a source you can use to tell if it is just your average everyday boomer, or if it is a Karen. Just like when you can tell the difference between a whitetail deer or an elk.

Now that you know just what a Karen is, let’s take a dive into the top 5 Karen freakouts and moments.

#5: Park Ranger Karen

(Click on the link to see the video)

Karen Video #5

This video demonstrates just how rude and racist they can be. That poor Asian family can’t even go on vacation without spotting a wild Karen. Karen blocks the Asian families path like she’s Gandolf like, “You shall not pass”, but with more racism. She goes out of her way to prove the point that Asians don’t belong in America, which they do. America is a free country, but some people believe in, “If you’re not white and have my haircut, you are a less important person than me”. Overall, the video is actually pretty decent. Although whoever was recording looked like they recorded it on a Gameboy from the 90’s, the video in itself is funny and deserves some credit.

#4: Crazy Verizon customer Karen

(Click on the link to see the video)

Karen Video #4

This video is flat out crazy. For those who can not understand the context of this video, Karen’s phone plan is crappy and she wants to change it. The Verizon employee talks to her about different plans she can choose from. But because Karen is on a whole other level than you, she thinks she should  get a brand new phone. The Verizon employee tells her that is not possible unless she pays for it. From then, the video downspirals in chaos. Karen basically turned into the Devil himself, and unleashed all her anger and hate on this poor employee. It was so bad, more employees came to help, and they still could not handle the power of the Karen. It’s like Naruto. He has the demon fox trapped inside of him, and when he gets backed into a corner, he can trigger this demon, and it gives him crazy powers. This video demonstrates how Karens think they are the head of society and they deserve more than the average person, when in reality, they don’t.

#3: Karen the Witch unleashes her powers on “trespasser”

(Click on the link to see the video)

Karen Video #3

This video lowkey creeps me out. Karen stands there in her long, black, straggly hair, just staring into your soul. She judges every part of you. If I were the poor, black man that was in that scenario, I’d try and throw boiling water at her to burn off her old, saggy witch skin. Not only is there witch Karen, there is her super compassionate partner, who I like to refer to as a Greg. Greg’s are basically the husband of a Karen, and demonstrate exactly what a Karen is, only in male form. Greg is not only asking the guy questions like a hardcore interrogation, he decides to roll his camera on his phone to probably show the police later. Typical Karen move. These beautifully racist couple probably have no clue that he is the owner of the property, but still go out of their way to question the black man if it’s his property, and then go on to call the cops, for standing on HIS OWN PROPERTY. Unbelievable. The delusion of the couple is out of this galaxy. Mind your own business, Karen.

#2: KidzBop Karen

(Click on the link to see the video)

Karen Video #2

This was very close to being #1 on this list, but compared to the next one is not as good. Anyways, this Karen goes WAY out of her way to tell the driver and the backseat passenger just how idiotic they are. Getting out of your car, in the middle of a street, just to yell at some people,  really takes some nerve. But Karens have that nerve. She rants on the driver for a little while, then she REALLY let’s it out against the passenger. She even goes as far to start yelling cuss words at them, while her kids are in the car next to them. And then, makes the face. Game over. Good luck with that. If I were them, I would just walk out of the car and ask for a car to run me over. That face is basically the infinity gauntlet. “Now, reality can be whatever she wants”, with that face. The best part of the whole video, and the signature mark, is when she tells her kids are, “too busy watching KidzBop”, to listen to her cuss. Every second of this video I burst into laughter uncontrollably. Just a surreal video.

Now, the best video of all

#1: Karen saves the day by calling cops on a black family at the park having BBQ

(Click on the link to watch the video)

Karen Video #1

Words can’t even describe this video. Karen is so incredibly ridiculous in this video I can’t even think. 24 minutes of utter Karenism, if that is even a word. Racist Karen goes out of her way to make life tough for an innocent black family just having a BBQ in a PUBLIC PARK. She pulls all kinds of reasons out of her gray hair about how it is bad for society and her city. A nearby citizen questions her for a little while. The black family talks to her, and she STEALS the lady’s credit card! Then Karen acts all defensive like she is being threatened or hurt. Then she pulls a typical Karen move, which is calling the cops if things don’t go her way. Even the police think she is an idiot. They too don’t care because after all it is a PUBLIC PARK. This Karen is so freaking delusional, she has no idea what she is doing. She needs to mind her own business, and stop trying to take charge of everything.

Top 5 Karen moments and freak outs

yaboykade3 Uncategorized , , , , , , , , , 0 Comment
Top 5 Karen moments and freak outs

The people we all love and hate… Karens. Karen’s are stupid. Karen’s are boomers. Karen’s ruin everything. And I mean everything. Karens also happen to be funny. Luckily for you, I scoured the internet far and wide to find the best, funniest, and most ridiculous Karen moments and freak outs. These videos demonstrate and show just exactly what a Karen is. What exactly is a Karen though? Let me explain.

 

The Origin Story

According to Wikipedia, a Karen pejorative term for someone perceived as entitled or demanding beyond the scope of what is appropriate or necessary. A common stereotype is that of a white woman who uses her privilege to demand her own way at the expense of others. Depictions also include demanding to “speak to the manager”, being racist, being anti-vaccination, or sporting a particular bob cut hairstyle. As of 2020, the term was increasingly being used as a general-purpose term of disapproval for middle-aged white women.”

 

Karens also have very distinct haircuts. The haircut is a source you can use to tell if it is just your average everyday boomer, or if it is a Karen. Just like when you can tell the difference between a whitetail deer or an elk.

Now that you know just what a Karen is, let’s take a dive into the top 5 Karen freak outs and moments.

#5: Park Ranger Karen

(Click on the link to see the video)

Karen Video #5

 

This video demonstrates just how rude and racist they can be. That poor Asian family can’t even go on vacation without spotting a wild Karen. Karen blocks the Asian families path like she’s Gandalf like, “You shall not pass”, but with more racism. She goes out of her way to prove the point that Asians don’t belong in America, which they do. America is a free country, but some people believe in, “If you’re not white and have my haircut, you are a less important person than me”. Overall, the video is actually pretty decent. Although whoever was recording looked like they recorded it on a Gameboy from the 90’s, the video in itself is funny and deserves some credit.

 

#4: Crazy Verizon customer Karen

(Click on the link to see the video)

Karen Video #4

 

This video is flat out crazy. For those who can not understand the context of this video, Karen’s phone plan is crappy and she wants to change it. The Verizon employee talks to her about different plans she can choose from. But because Karen is on a whole other level than you, she thinks she should  get a brand new phone. The Verizon employee tells her that is not possible unless she pays for it. From then, the video down spirals in chaos. Karen basically turned into the Devil himself, and unleashed all her anger and hate on this poor employee. It was so bad, more employees came to help, and they still could not handle the power of the Karen. It’s like Naruto. He has the demon fox trapped inside of him, and when he gets backed into a corner, he can trigger this demon, and it gives him crazy powers. This video demonstrates how Karen’s think they are the head of society and they deserve more than the average person, when in reality, they don’t.

 

#3: Karen the Witch unleashes her powers on “tresspasser”

(Click on the link to see the video)

Karen Video #3

 

This video low key creeps me out. Karen stands there in her long, black, straggly hair, just staring into your soul. She judges every part of you. If I were the poor, black man that was in that scenario, I’d try and throw boiling water at her to burn off her old, saggy witch skin. Not only is there witch Karen, there is her super compassionate partner, who I like to refer to as a Greg. Greg’s are basically the husband of a Karen, and demonstrate exactly what a Karen is, only in Male form. Greg is not only asking the guy questions like it is 21 questions, he decides to roll his camera on his phone to probably show the police later. Typical Karen move. These beautifully racist couple probably have no clue that he is the owner of the property, but still go out of their way to question the black man if it’s his property, and then go on to call the cops, for standing on HIS OWN PROPERTY. Unbelievable. The delusion of the couple is out of this galaxy. Mind your own business, Karen.

 

#2: KidsBop Karen

(Click on the link to see the video)

Karen Video #2

 

This was very close to being #1 on this list, but compared to the next one is not as good. Anyways, this Karen goes WAY out of her way to tell the driver and the backseat passenger just how idiotic they are. Getting out of your car, in the middle of a street, just to yell at some people,  really takes some nerve. But Karens have that nerve. She rants on the driver for a little while, then she REALLY lets it all out against the passenger. She even goes as far to start yelling cuss words at them, while her kids are in the car next to them. And then, makes this face. 

 

Game over. Good luck with that. If I were them, I would just walk out of the car and ask for a car to run me over. That face is basically the infinity gauntlet. “Now, reality can be whatever she wants”, with that face. The best part of the whole video, and the signature mark, is when she tells her kids are, “too busy watching KidsBop”, to listen to her cuss. Every second of this video I burst into laughter uncontrollably. Just a surreal video.

 

Now, the best video of all

#1: Karen saves the day by calling cops on black family at park having BBQ

(Click on the link to watch the video)

Karen Video #1

Words can’t even describe this video. Karen is so incredibly ridiculous in this video I can’t even think. 24 minutes of utter Karenism, if that is even a word. Racist Karen goes out of her way to make life tough for an innocent black family just having a BBQ in a PUBLIC PARK. She pulls all kinds of reasons out of her gray hair about how it is bad for society and her city. A nearby citizen questions her for a little while. The black family talks to her, and she STEALS the lady’s credit card! Then Karen acts all defensive like she is being threatened or hurt. Then she pulls a typical Karen move, which is calling the cops if things don’t go her way. Even the police think she is an idiot. They too don’t care because after all it is a PUBLIC PARK. This Karen is so freaking delusional, she has no idea what she is doing. She needs to mind her own business, and stop trying to take charge of everything.

Top 5 Florida man stories

heinzale000 Uncategorized , , 0 Comment
Top 5 Florida man stories

The Florida man, people in Florida doing crazy and questionable things. This happens quite often. There is always a funny story about a Florida man each day. I decided to write an article to recognize some of the best and funniest Florida man stories. Five stories are talking about Florida men.

McDonald Mayhem

A Florida man didn’t get a straw so he attacked a McDonald’s employee. The man was unaware of a new city law that went into effect on Jan. 1 requiring customers to request straws. He got angry and started screaming and grabbed the collar of one of the employees and pulled them over the table. In defense, the employee punched the man in the face. The man got very angry and when he started to leave, he kicked a different employee in the stomach and then left.

Devil Dilemma

A Florida man killed his Ex-Girlfriend while trying to ‘get rid of the devil’. His Ex-Girlfriend ended their relationship with the man. When police found her body there was a gunshot wound in her head. That same day another person was shot in the face, they received treatment in the hospital. On a news website, bradenton.com, the man said, “I was trying to get rid of the devil.” Many people do believe that you can get rid of the devil. People blame the devil for all the bad things people do to them, so did the man.

Grenade Stop

A Florida man finds a WWII grenade, places it in his truck, drives to Taco Bell. on the news website newsweek.com, it said, “The man had been magnet fishing and somehow picked up a grenade.” The man was magnet fishing and got a grenade. He then decides to go to a Taco Bell with the grenade in the back of his truck. The cops were called and everyone was evacuated out of the Taco Bell. The police said they will dispose of the grenade properly.

Stolen Dr. Pepper

A Florida man takes his car and crashes it into a bar to steal a Dr. Pepper. He drove the car into one of the front windows and proceeded to walk into the bar. He opened the cooler and grabbed a Dr. Pepper. When the police were called he was sitting there drinking his Dr. Pepper. He also had a gun which made the charge from a burglary into an armed burglary.

Honorable Mentions

Now for three honorable mentions. A Florida man caught on camera licking a doorbell. Next, a Florida man throws a toilet through a school board building window, when he was arrested he was sitting on a person. Lastly, a Florida man was arrested for supposedly throwing a cookie at his girlfriend.